सोचते सोचते सोच धूमिल हो गयी ।
खोजते खोजते खोज ही बदल गयी ।
चलते चलते रस्ते बदल गए ।
चाहत को पाने की ज़िद में चाहत ही बदल गयी ।
ना वजूद अपना देखके शब्द मौन हो गए ।
आँसू भी अब शिकवा करना भूल गए ।
कठोर थे जो कभी वो फैसले बदल गए ।
अर्थ जानते तब तक मायने ही बदल गए ।
उम्मीद की दिखाई दिशा भी बदल गयी ।
कुछ हम बदले तो कुछ तुम भी तो बदल गए ।
प्यार था जिस मंज़िल से वो मंज़िल भी बदल गयी ।
किस से शिकायत करे नज़रिए ही बदल गए।
©Shalu Makhija
Dark and foggy, the chilling winter dawn welcomed me this morning..
Plants were shivering n
Birds wanted to delay the day start..
I smiled and greeted the beauty of dawn..
The breeze was clear mixed with fragrant trees. White smoke with my breath was perfect for some long breathing exercise.
Filled up with gratitude, I bowed down to the nature.
The first sight of dawn was just perfect to give healing touch.
Calm n quiet, my favorite frozen dawn got ready to whisper.
Little tree-pie tweeted the song
Making the dawn musical n vocal.
Happy n contented, right in morning thanked the dawn for precious blessings.
Made my way to beautiful Bio-walk with a glass full of water
Connecting the health to wealth of nature
fell in love once again with Dawn.
Blessings
© Shalu Makhija
I still struggle to find myself
4 decades have passed..
All seasons r witnessed
Traveled around the world
Ups and downs are absorbed
Forests n oceans guide my way
Nature with power bless my life
I still struggle to find myself
Degrees gathered n duties changed all these years..
From daughter n sister
Graduated to wife n mother
Student to career woman
Studies to management
I still struggle to find myself
Learning basics to masters
Acquired wisdom of age
Integrity to life hacks
Balancing the health n wealth
Still searching the real me
Still perplexed with the purpose of life
I still struggle to find myself
The foggy morning of winter
So much resembles my life
As the path is invisible
So as next chapter of this life.
I cherish this novel
Live it with curiosity to unfold the ‘next’
Wish I meet “myself” before the climax.
Love.
Tired and exhausted from all my day work
Feeling dissatisfied at the end of the day.
Childhood memories define me sincere n hardworking.
Completed all studies with tag of accomplishments
Behaved responsibly my teenage n followed the “RIGHT” path
But when today I’m looking back
Feeling dissatisfied.
Marriage and business demanded most of my time.
Never cheated on work schedule n gave my best with sincerity n honesty
12years of work life and I put my best.
Got all my wishes fulfilled, possessions n holidays enriched the list
But today when I give look to where I’m
feeling dissatisfied
As a wife, met all the duties n obligations, right in time.
No awkward demands, co-operation and being ready to change n compromise worked as my motto
But life hits hard n keeps me
Feeling dissatisfied
Days n nights, months n years melted just like that.
Raising 2 kids gave bundle of joys n sorrows.
Being happy n tensed, worried n overwhelmed became part n parcel of life.
11years of motherhood n still today when I look back
Feeling dissatisfied.
Perplexed n confused today
Do not wish to overreact
Want to get rid of perfection
Still exploring the illusion of knowledge,
Without being judgemental,
Trying to find “self-worth”
Lost in journey somewhere behind..
Lost in jungle of human animals,
was hoping to find the love, care and humanity around
was hoping to find the miracle God figure,
was hoping to see things in ” right” and ” wrong”
but all I could see was the law of jungle
ruling the human world.
The struggle to survive and sustain was above everything.
The desire to attack the weak and poor remains burning in each human animal.
The circle of life is working without consent
No miracle figure is fighting the injustice
No divine intervention is forcing the life.
Wealthy and powerful makes and breaks the rules.
Millions of lives are at mercy of system.
Uneasy and restless , I am searching the God
wanted to plead to appear and enforce the law
Sad and impatient feeling together
Made my way towards the home.
Composed the self and calmed down a bit
I could see my maid working day and nights
making sure that her kid gets to study hard
A young boy in neighborhood took all pain
to take parents to the hospital.
My eyes could locate a couple deaf and dumb
making the livelihood by setting the floral shop.
Got the insight that God is nowhere but
lives within us.
My soul is My God and My power.
The divine intervention is within us
guiding us all through the life.
Give your ear- and the voice is clear
Look inside and God is right there
Love the self and Self becomes beautiful
Believe in self and God within enlightens you.
Rains are blessing the plains
Peacocks are dancing with delight
Plants and trees are blushing with fragrant drops of rains
Blue sky is smiling clear n loud.
Blurred vision with raindrops does not let eyes blink.
My earnest heart wants to fly high.
My hands are loaded with everyday chores,
My day is loaded with appointments and tasks,
My work demands me to respond in time.
My earnest heart wants to go in flow with my pen.
Relations keep me busy all day.
Rituals do not end in a day.
Necessities are in war with preferences.
Individuality resists in taking back stage.
My earnest heart aims to feel light with rays of sunlight.
I start my morning walk with speed.
I push my legs to catch on run.
I set my endomondo to record the miles.
My earnest heart ignores my efforts to catch the sight of that shy kingfisher.
I explain my heart .
I guide it to work in line.
I make it realise the value of time n duties
It does not rebel or reveal but I know that I don’t want it to be quiet.
Beautiful and energetic..O’ my friend
Where you are loosing yourself!
Sporty and resourceful..O’ my friend
Why you are stuck with petty matters!
Commanding and visionary ..O’ my friend
Why you listen to the noise of babblers!
Go getter and creative…O’ my friend
From when these worldly standards became right for you!
Daredevil and Dreamer.. O’ my friend
How comments can play with your moods?
Know yourself….
You are here to achieve..
You are here to experience..
You are here to give your creation..
You are here to make your impressions.
Know, accept and redeposit the love and appreciation for yourself.
You are here to rock the world!!
Working for days, week and years
Accumulating wealth and assets
Succumbed to daily duties and chores
Chatting nonstop to so called friends
taking pain of all problems around
Listening to all dirty politics in media
Worrying on the stressed traffic of the city
Upset by the pending work load in emails,
I take a halt n ask myself
Does it really matter to me?
Is it that important to steal my peace and smile everyday?
NEED TO FIX WHAT REALLY MATTERS
Smiling talkative face of my kids , coming from school matters to me !
Healthy and Hygienic food for my family matters to me!
Happy, motivated and dedicated work force in my office matters to me!
The satisfaction of my old parents after talking to me matters to me!
Welcoming each morning with big smile and rigorous exercise matters to me!
Appreciation emails from my buyers, adorning the handcraft of artisans matter to me !
Stealing the chance to escape for a long drive on bullet-500 matters to me!
Expressing the thoughts on words and creating the positive, beautiful vibrations matter to me !
This new perspective matters to me !
This peaceful, positive and beautiful life matters to me!
Life is so volatile
Just like a leaf which flies away with air
Just like dust which disappears with broom
Just like mist hides away with the ray of sun.
Life betrays
Just like mirage in dessert
Just like those snowy Himalayas
Just like the horizons that is never touched
Life is a puzzle
Just like Maths that demands infinite formulas
Just like you are lost in jungle n trying to find your way out
Just like video game that keeps you engrossed but leaves you empty
Life makes you cry
Just like a toy that is never bought
Just like love that is never achieved
Just like a fight that can not be undone
Life is a prayer
Just like oxygen that keeps us alive
Just like medicine that heals our pain
Just like family and friends that support us
Just like sleep that rejuvenates.
Life is precious
Link it with nature.
Connect it to Supreme energy
Surrender it to God .
After lunch, writing his homework, my 10 years old son asks, ” Mom.. if I speak Muslim prayer, I become Muslim” ?
One question ignites thousand questions to my mind ! My little boy why do you need to think on religion! Why you are worried for Muslim prayer when you have never bothered to recite any prayer before! Who is giving you such weird thought!
The story unfolds ahead. Controlling the storm of thoughts I reply, No beta.. prayer is a beautiful medium to interact with the Supreme God. It is a conversation. You do not become Muslim by reciting any prayer.
Taking a breeze of relief, my son tells that his Muslim classmate forcefully stopped him on the way and asked him to speak whatever he speaks. Not indulging in any fight, in hurry to catch the school bus, he did the same. Once he finished speaking after him , the little boy of his class ( must be of same age) informs him that you just said a Muslim prayer so you are now Muslim !!!!
He further informs that the boy is mighty and can hit him so he thought of better to go with the flow than actually confront him !!!
Yes, I agree with him because probably I have always taught him that do not get in to fights rather try to avoid and skip the situation cleverly.
I know probably in days to come I will empower him with right knowledge of Hinduism and other religions so he remains strong internally to deal any such situations.
I know we will come up with hundreds of answers to speak – to reply-to deal with such situation
I know we will have 50 different alternatives to react to this situation.
But I could not find answer that
Why the little 10 years old boy wants to make the other little boy Muslim??? Why that little innocent kid is on mission? and who are the people who are filling these little kids with such poisonous thoughts.. why kids are not being spared to play, laugh, study, think, read , invent and explore…?
I am sad today. I always thought that politicians, religious heads, community heads are playing the dirty games to create tensions between communities, religions for their self interest. The common man be it Hindu – Muslim or of any religion is busy and super involved in his daily duties and family life.
But this small incident proves me wrong.
India is a secular country. Unity in diversity is what we believe in. We know and accept that with each state our, traditions, culture , cuisine, language, dressings, festivals change and we love that. We can not think of uniform people with uniform mindset, with uniform language, with uniform dressing with uniform festivals…noooo..never.
We can not think India without Hindus – Muslims- Christians- JSikhs- ains- Budhhists- Parsis.. ! We can boast for everyone. One can never find a Hindu without Muslim friend and Muslim without Hindu friend. All fights on one side but we will be ready to die for our dear friends -whatever religion they belong to . We are the people who welcome all festival with equal thrill. Diwali crackers, Holi colors go in harmony with Eid Davats and Christmas celebrations.
Terrorists on this earth do not belong to any religion for what they are doing is brutal and against mankind. But when I am telling a story of 10 years old kids ( one Hindu and one Muslim studying in Jesus school – isn’t it the most beautiful combination) – I am definitely not referring to any anti social element here. All I say is that we the common people should follow our religion, perform our duties but more than that must give right and correct understanding and ethics to our kids. We must educate them to respect all religion and people . If we as family impart the right understanding to our kids to develop respect, acceptance and love for all religion and people, our unity will ensure our growth.
p.s.real story dated 9-7-15
Self-Talk 